Who’s Who?

Posted by Riffs at 2:56 am on Tuesday, 3 June, 2008

Matty Issues – Lead Singer & Rhythm Guitar

Matty Issues

Male, 22 years old, main influences include Kelly Jones, Matt Bellemy, Riff’s, Eightbar, and The Destroyer. Matt has been known to step foot in the Wheelhouse from time to time for a drink and to verbally promote the band to the unsuspecting public, rumour has it he has to give a weeks notice in order for them to hire two more bouncers and three more bar staff!

Jamie (Nickname TBA) Borrowdale – Lead / Rhythm Guitar

PICT0944 (Custom)

The newest member of the band Jamie is only 18 years old but has seemingly been playing for over 20. Joe Satriani, Jimi Hendrix and Jimi Page’s influences all include Jamie. Eager to spread the DiF word with his new band mates Jamie was once described as an arrogant douche…he’s gonna fit in perfectly.

Rob ‘Riffs’ Green – Rhythm / Lead Guitar

Riffs

Male, 24 years old. Wields a classic cherry red, wood finished Gibson Les Paul Studio. Main influences include Slash, Synyster Gates, Josh Homme, Machinehead, Kelly Jones, Led Zeppellin, and his sexy band-mates. Has also been spotted in local clubs and bars from time to time promising to Decorate the Kaiser Cheifs in Flames.

Andrew ‘Eightbar’ Gregg – Bass Guitar

Eightbar

Male, 24 years old, main influences include; Tool, Iron Maiden, Deftones. It is said Carling are soon to bring out a pint named after him.

Chris the Destroyer – Drums

The Destroyer

Male, 20 years old, main influences include John Bonham, Mike Portman, Chad Smith, Tony Royster, Ginger Baker, and Toto! Until new arival Jamie, the former baby of the band Chris was weened on Jack and his pacifier was a Marlboro King Size.

Andrew ‘Bono’ Bowness – Web Guy / Roadie / Camera Man / Driver

PICT0704 (Large)

Male, 24 years old, although Bono (pronounced ‘Bone-o’ to avoid mistaking him with the biggest douche in the universe from U2) is not musically part of the band, no one denies his ever present contribution to the bands existence, ranging from transport for nights out, carrying equipment, web-design (this isn’t him writing by the way!!), and turning up to countless practices for insight and filming. Although not quite as regularly on the sauce as the rest, when he does…you better be ready to be Boned!

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